Faith over Fear

I would be lying if I said that leaving for 11 months to go abroad didn’t scare me.  It completely terrifies me. I have never been abroad. The bravest thing that I have done in regard to moving is packing up my bags to move to New York City on my own. That was my own dream though. So, when this opportunity presented itself the fear is how I knew that I was meant to do this.

In the famous words of Nelson Mandela: “Courage is not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear.” I know that I am going to radically change in my faith. I am going to grow so much this next year that it is hard to even fathom it.

Not only am I going to change but the people that we are serving will be radically impacted. I know first-hand the power that is in the unfailing love and grace that God gives us. Stepping out in faith this way is major for me. I will be giving up the comfort and security that I currently have in life. I got to NYC a little over a year ago and I do not feel ready to leave. While I went on mission trips in High School, this is more than just a mission trip. This is giving up everything to follow Jesus. Thinking about it send shivers down my spine. That there are 15-20 others that are taking this giant leap of faith with me is so encouraging. We are getting the chance to live like the disciples did and dropping everything and following Him. 

I feel that I am just getting started here and that there is still so much that I want to do here. God’s plans are much bigger and better for my life though. Trust is hard when you are holding something you thought was the best. In the moment that the exchange is happening we experience this feeling of “without”. In that moment, that is where our trust in the Lord our God grows.

I have been conflicted. I have been talking to friends here about how I am not ready to leave the city. A good friend of mine pointed out that God calling me here could have been the start of the stripping away process. Getting me out of my comfort zone in order to prepare me for this next step of faith.

As I am building my Trust in God, I keep telling myself to hold faith over fear. God does not give us a spirit of fear but a spirit of courage. That God has so much in store that is bigger and better than I can even imagine. He is working in my life. He has been preparing me. I am also very excited. I know that it will not always be easy. It won’t always be pretty, but it will be life changing. It will be world changing. It will be worth it.